Chapter 1
Inside of the Megabuddies Base, the MB gang was heading downstairs and deeper into the building, using all the fancy secret staircases, and complex elevators and such, as they returned from one of many recent successful missions. The most recent mission, to rent a movie from Blockbuster because the MBs have seen everything in their library, had been a roaring success. Each MB had picked out a movie they wanted to watch and was holding it in their hands, all except Cajun. As the MBs all walked along, Cajun struggled to keep up, for he had piles of movies in his arms stacked at least two feet above his head and it was hard to see where he was going.
Crimson stared at Cajun as he desperately tried to balance the movies he was carrying so that they didn’t fall out of his arms and all over the place. “Hey human… Why did you rent thirty movies anyway? We never have time to watch them all before they are due.”
Cajun was insulted and argued back. “
I can… Find… The time!” he shouted.
“You were supposed to pick
one anyway, you know…”
“Are you
mad!?” gasped Cajun. “I can’t pick just
one!”
Crimson shrugged. “Eh. Whatever, Cajun…”
T_L interrupted. “Hey Cajun, I can’t find my flask, it’s been missing all day. You haven’t seen it, have you?”
“
You have a
flask?” Cajun asked back, wide-eyed.
“Don’t you lie, bro. I
know a bunch of you have been in my room, sneaking swigs from time to time. I installed security cameras.” T_L hissed.
“Say
what….?” gasped Cajun, Gbleek and Simian. They all looked around nervously, hoping he wouldn’t see their red-faces.
“Fine, I
know about your flask, but I haven’t seen the flask for a couple of days. Sorry.” said Cajun. “Oh that’s some nice Jack Daniels you got in there lately by the way.”
T_L growled angrily at Cajun. He looked at Simian, who was looking at his movie, the original Planet of the Apes.
“Simian, you seen my flask?” asked T_L.
“
Noooope.” said Simian, still not taking his eye off the monkey riding a horse on the DVD cover. “Heh heh… Stupid monkey, it’s acting like us!”
T_L face-palmed. “
Where could it be!?” he asked out loud.
“Oh by the way, find the time to watch this one with me, Cajun.” Crimson randomly announced. “It’s better than everyone else’s movies because mine is about
vampires, and you know that this makes it better just because. You know? My movie is about this mortal girl that falls in love with one of my kind. You
know how this is going to work out.” She looked at her rental choice excitedly, laughing morbidly. “
Stupid chick’s going to get eaten… Heh heh…”
“You rented
Twilight, Crimson!?” gasped T_L. “This is so out of character… How can you do this, leader?”
The male MBs looked at Crimson terrified. Crimson blinked confused.
“
Twilight… Sounds…
vaguely familiar… Enlighten me, ducklings.” said Crimson blankly, as she began using her tongue to pick at something stuck to the top of one of her teeth.
All of the MBs crammed themselves into an elevator and Simian pressed the floor button. The elevator began bringing them further downstairs.
“It’s this
fantastic movie about this lonely girl who moves into a crappy town. I have
no idea how such a good movie like that can be overlooked for Best Picture nominations during the awards season… Anyway, the girl is ok because it’s where she meets him…” Belbell sighed dreamily.
“
Him?” asked Crimson, confused.
“
Edward, that’s the pale-faced pedophile vampire **** who sparkles in the sunshine. Not joking. Come on people, we’re talking about Twilight here, one of the worst book series
and movies ever made…” said T_L with a serious face.
All of the male MBs in the elevator nodded their heads, approving of T_L’s negative but realistic description of Edward.
“
He’s lying! Crimson, Edward is a dreamy teenage vampire who sparkles in the sun and drinks rabbit’s blood. And he compares girls to lions and lambs! And oh my god, you should see him shirtless…” gasped Belbell, fantasizing over him.
“I think that’s all we want to hear about him, Belbell.” Brad mumbled awkwardly at her. “No seriously, stop, that’s a freaking order…”
“
Sparkles in the sun? Who the hell wrote this, we vampires
do not sparkle in the sun.” Crimson’s face puffed up insulted.
“Stephanie Meyer.” Stainless answered. “We should burn down her house as a mission one day…” he suggested.
“
Excellent idea, minion, you’re gonna be a real winner some day.” T_L told Stainless pleased. “Now if only we could convince the other droog otherwise… Twilight is a bad book series.” he looked at CuteCat.
CuteCat rolled her eyes.
“Thank you master.” Stainless said gleefully.
________
“Does the vampire eat the girl or not?” Crimson finally shouted.
“No.” interjected Cajun.
Belbell jumped to defend her favorite book series. “But it’s steamily romantic, Crimson. It’s one of the best romance stories of the past fifty years!”
“
Apparently you haven’t seen anything else…” commented T_L.
Everybody else snickered at her.
Belbell blushed annoyed and ignored the guys. “Crimson, we can watch New Moon after we watch Twilight. I rented the sequel!” she squealed idiotically.
“This movie insults me and my kind, and I shall not watch it.” said Crimson blankly. She looked at the movie she held in her hands bitterly. “I knew I should have rented 30 Days of Night…”
“But Crimson, all the
cool girls watch it.” Belbell coaxed.
“
Don’t do it leader, it’s a trap!” shouted Simian fearfully.
“And I’m not a girl, I’m a
vampire.” Crimson stuck her tongue out at Belbell.
Belbell shrieked enraged and then calmed down, suddenly realizing she still had somebody to watch New Moon with her. “Oh Nathan…” she lulled. “Guess what we’re watching tonight.”
“
Oh shit…” coughed Nathan under his breath. “I wanted to watch Iron Man…”
“My movie is better than yours and we shall watch it first, and then re-watch it ten times over and over.”
“But baby…” sighed Nathan depressed, tears forming in his eyes, as the terror sunk in.
“
I SAID WE’RE WATCHING NEW MOON.” Belbell screamed at Nathan.
Crimson finally decided she didn’t want to carry around her movie anymore, and broke it in half. She looked at Belbell, grabbed New Moon from her, and destroyed it too.
“
What the hell are you doing, Crimson!?” screamed Belbell in terror.
Belbell began bawling over the destruction of her favorite movie. Nathan began crying as well, he cried however out of the painful memories brought on by almost having to watch Twilight, combined with tears of joy from the leader sparing him such a terrible fate.
“Thank god.” Cajun blurted out.
Belbell punched him in the gut and Cajun’s DVDs went flying everywhere.
“Take that!” growled Belbell. “That was a
GOOD movie.”
“My movies…” Cajun whimpered. “Don’t step on them! Watch your feet on the way out…”
The elevator opened and everyone poured out. As the group left the elevator, Stainless stayed behind to help him pick up all of the DVDs lying everywhere.
__________________
Rosebuddy, who had decided to stay and hold the base while everybody went to rent movies, was nowhere to be seen.
“Hello…” Crimson called out down a hall. Nobody replied. “
Strange….”
A doorknob turned on one of the many doors in the hall, and the door slowly opened. A head peeked out. It was Rosebuddy.
“Rosebuddy?” asked Soma.
Rosebuddy’s eyes widened alarmed. She raised her hands to her lips urgently.
“
Shhhhh….” Rosebuddy hissed. “
Talking is a bad idea…” mouthed Rosebuddy, clearly disturbed by something.
“Human, why are you not at your post!?” shouted Crimson loudly, ignoring all of the signs that something was amiss.
Rosebuddy shuddered. “
Stop talking, leader… You’ll alert it that we’re here…”
“
Oh great… Did you fall asleep watching cartoons again and somebody broke in?” Crimson growled.
“You’ve doomed us all…” said ZF, shaking his head.
“But… I didn’t! He just… showed up.”
“What do you mean, showed up?” asked CuteCat.
“Lower your voices…” Rosebuddy told them again. “One second he wasn’t there… The next he was….”
“
So… you found my flask, laced it with LSD, and are having drunken hallucinations now?” asked T_L, confused. “Where is it, out with it…”
“
What the hell do you want me to tell you!?” hissed Rosebuddy frightened. “He just teleported out of thin air. I hid in here before it could see me. He was in the entertainment room when I saw it last. That was about thirty minutes ago, not sure if he’s still here.”
“So we’re being robbed or something by a teleporting burglar?” asked Crimson.
“Yes…” confirmed Rosebuddy.
“
Well then why the **** aren’t you defending our possessions you selfish human!? What if he tries to eat one of my cats!? Out of your room, we’re going to go find him.” Crimson trumpeted.
Everyone mindlessly ran after her as she charged down the hall until they found the entertainment room. The mysterious robber was still there.
A small leprechaun currently had his grimy little hands around T_L’s flask, and was currently treating himself to a nice hearty swig of its contents. As the creature wrapped his lips around the flask, T_L saw it and screamed.
“It would appear that what we are dealing with is no ordinary robber. What we have here is….” Crimson paused momentarily before finishing. “A leprechaun.”
“
MY FLASK!!! I’LL KILL YOU!!!” roared T_L, alerting the creature of their presences and charging at it.
The leprechaun screamed and grabbed the MB’s Pikachu N64 and copy of Gbleek’s Magical Pony Adventure. “
Aaaaagh!!!” it screamed. “I’ll be seeing you folks around…”
The leprechaun began running around the base with the N64 and game in his arms, drinking from T_L’s flask maniacally every now and then, knowing that it pissed off the owner.
“
STOP PUTTING YOUR NASTY LITTLE LIPS ON IT!!!” screamed T_L, grabbing a broom and trying to whack the leprechaun as it danced around him, mocking him.
“Stop putting your nasty little lips on it, sonny. Oh heh heh heh.” laughed the leprechaun.
“
Everybody! Catch that leprechaun! He has the N64!” cried the leader.
The MBs dutifully pursued the naughty little *******, as it danced and mocked them and their efforts.
Cajun and Stainless finally arrived on the scene and stood where they were standing with their jaws dropped.
“
Holy shit… Is that a freaking leprechaun, Cajun?” asked Stainless. He rubbed his eyes.
“I haven’t been drinking from his flask lately…
So… If you can see it too then… Yeah. We have a leprechaun in our base.” Cajun said slowly.
“Sweet, let’s catch it.” said Stainless grinning. “I’m feeling lucky…”
“Why?”
“Aren’t leprechauns lucky?”
“Well… We haven’t caught it yet, we’re probably as lucky as we are every other day.”
“Oh… Whatever, let’s just go get the damn thing.”
“Ok.”
End of Chapter 1